The Rose

Hosea 2:15  I will make the Valley of Achor (Trouble) a door of hope and expectation for her.

Mornings are the toughest and sleep has not come easy. I wake up crying, these tears are coming from deep within my soul and spirit. God is so good and I am trusting HIM with all my heart. He blessed me with a sign this morning as I prayed. He used a photo HE has used before to confirm HIS call on my life . The life and death of our Alexis Rose Washington will lead many to the Lord, it already has.  So I feel  led to share this photo again.

What became apparent last time was the plaque that reads : You are now entering your mission field ( he confirmed he wants me to be a speaker : ) and what became apparent today was the vase of roses on the table beside me.  They look as if they are an extension of me. Tears formed in my eyes as I thought of the power in this picture and how God keeps revealing more to me through this amazing photo.

Then I remembered a string of emails between my sister Kathey and her friend Barbara. In these emails that started about a year before her death and ended a few months before she died Kathey and Barbara shared their lives, hopes, dreams, and faith. She talked about God and how her relationship with him specifically knowing Him as the God of the triune ( God, Jesus, and Holy Spirit)  sustained her through so many of our family’s tragedies . She only referred to one scripture which was Psalm 121 which was the first scripture I felt led to memorize after the Virginia Tech massacre ( I didn’t know of these e-mails then). That was not a coincidence, that was God ‘s tapestry weaving in our lives . It is a sign from HIM that I can go back to when I struggle, HE knew.

In these e-mails Kathey referred to one song  : The Rose by Bette Midler, I didn’t realize this song meant so much to her but this is not a coincidence either, this is a precious sign from God to brind me comfort during this sorrowful time .   I thought of  the Kathey’s emails  today as I saw the vase of Roses that look to be an extension of me in the photo of me praying.  Alexis , my Rosebud, is an extension of me and will always be in my heart. It is another one of God’s gifts showing the tapestry of how our lives are intertwined and I know my precious Rosebud is with my precious sister in Heaven.

More importantly I know what God expects me to do : SHARE HIS LOVE AND GRACE TO A HURTING WORLD AND LET THEM KNOW THERE IS ALWAYS HOPE EVEN IN THEIR DARKEST HOUR (S).  ( that was my blog on June 5 two days before she died, at that time I thought I knew my darkest hour  thinking my world couldn’t or wouldn’t get any darker BUT it did and as I am IN the midst of this  darkness  HE surrounds me with HIS LIGHT and that LIGHT  shines brighter.

Light is more apparent in the Darkness and of course more needed so I am going to let HIS light SHINE BRIGHT from within  during this very dark time.  This tragedy has broken me more but I know LIGHT shines more brightly through broken vessels there are now more cracks for HIS LIGHT to shine through.  I want HIS LIGHT to be apparent in me.  TRUSTING HIM COMPLETELY AND HIS PLAN. 

So thankful for all the prayers and support. Here are the words to the song , again the only song, my sister Kathey shared in her email  and of course my daughter’s middle name. God is amazing. This song is perfect for Alexis, she is the ROSE and I named her well.  She is a seed that will produce a great harvest !!!!

“The Rose”

Some say love, it is a river
That drowns the tender reed.
Some say love, it is a razor
That leaves your soul to bleed.
Some say love, it is a hunger,
An endless aching need.
I say love, it is a flower,
And you its only seed.

It’s the heart afraid of breaking
That never learns to dance.
It’s the dream afraid of waking
That never takes the chance.
It’s the one who won’t be taken,
Who cannot seem to give,
And the soul afraid of dyin’
That never learns to live.

When the night has been too lonely
And the road has been too long,
And you think that love is only
For the lucky and the strong,
Just remember in the winter
Far beneath the bitter snows
Lies the seed that with the sun’s love
In the spring becomes the rose.

Roses have long been a symbol for LOVE. We know Alexis loved BIG and we now know how much she was LOVED. I am so glad she can witness from heaven the difference she made. She didn’t believe that while on this earth. Let your friends  and family know how much they mean to you, you never know when it will be their time. LOVE BIG like Alexis Rose did : )) We can’t love BIG in our own strength we have rely on JESUS !!!

Hosea 2:15  I will make the Valley of Achor (Trouble) a door of hope and expectation for her.