The importance of DATES :) not dates with guys :))

Dates have always been so important in my life. Not dates with guys :)) but just actual dates.  God’s word says nothing happens by accident so the specific dates and timing of events in my life have  been very important ,  making my testimony more powerful I believe.

I try to figure it out but God’s ways are higher than mine (Isaiah 55 ⁸ “For My thoughts are not your thoughts, Nor are your ways My ways,” says the Lord.⁹ “For as the heavens are higher than the earth ,So are My ways higher than your ways, And My thoughts than your thoughts .) but I do think about it. For instance my brother, David, took his life on the July 4 holiday. This is the day  we celebrate our  freedom as a country ,  I find it so ironic that his death on Independence  was the beginning of dependence,  bondage, and oppression for my family. There is freedom now but for years we were all in a self-imposed prison and sadly I was the only one who found my freedom during this lifetime.

Memorial Day is probably the most significant with both mother and Kathey dying on the same holiday , at the same  age of 49. Although mother and Kathey both  died on Memorial Day , mother died May 28, 1979 and Kathey died May 31, 1999 which is today.  So Memorial Day is very significant and the dates are as well.  As I thought about  this I realized  a lot more has happened on May 31. So I will do my own this date in Susan’s history : ))) May 31

Many important things have happened on May 31 in my life : Kathey’s death on  5/31/99, standing in court receiving my sentence for manufacturing methamphetamine on  5/31/01 and  having a break through counseling session concerning my mother on 5/31/11 with Jill Crowe and Patti Ramsey. Just one year ago today !!!  What is so significant about these two women and that session is they are who I reached out to a few weeks ago when I was struggling with some very  painful issues and  we have been meeting weekly praying . They are filling me up and guiding me in HIS truth.

I was just  amazed when I realized that session took place last year on this date and think it was God’s confirmation that he will heal me. He healed me from the pain , shame, and guilt I felt about my MOM. He healed me  when I drew near to him. What I am going through now is small potatoes compared to mother’s death, I am strong!!!

Feeling confident that the foundation I am laying for my ministry is strong,  prepared to support what this calling on my life will bring. Next week we are going to do I Worship with Rita, Rita’s music always refreshes my spirit and soul : )).

So thankful  these wonderful women of God are so  life giving . They are certainly gainers in my life and not drainers , as Keith would say: ))  Honestly,  I can’t think of anyone in my life who is a drainer.  I am so blessed. Patti made the comment that if we continue to give of ourselves by reaching out to others and not take the time to fill back up and refresh we will become empty and void. Being intentional to take time to drink from the fountain of living water. "Whoever drinks of the water that I shall give him will never thirst," He told her. "But the water that I shall give him will become in him a fountain of water springing up into everlasting life." John 4:14

Joe- Seeing Joe through God's eyes, what a gift :))

  

Yesterday I posted this picture and a friend made the comment that the old man is the physical reality that humans see: the shadow is the spirtual reality that God sees. His comment reminded me of a student named Joe that I taught in Amarillo. God showed me a spiritual reality about this boy long before I knew the Lord as my Savior. What a blessing that I could look at Joe through a different lens. It was a very powerful vision so I thought I would share.

                                                                             JOE

During my final year of college I taught gymnastics to preschoolers.  There was a special class of foster children who came for awhile. Joe was the cutest little boy, with a bright smile and full of energy.  He took to gymnastics and would flip down the trampoline.  We all loved him and felt such compassion for him.  Joe had a very hard life for such a little boy. He had been sexually and physically abused. We were all horrified that this happened to such a cute, sweet little boy. We did everything we could to build Joe up and let him know we thought he was great and that we cared for him.

        My life went on and I left the gym to teach special education at a middle school in Amarillo.  I never really thought about Joe again.  During my fourth year of teaching I had a new boy enroll.  This boy was a mess. There were two dead roaches on the collar of his coat, and it was obvious he hadn’t bathed in a long time. Most everyone in the office was disgusted  and kept their distance, even the teachers.  As I looked into this sad boy’s eyes I realized it was Joe. He was no longer cute or sweet.  The years of abuse had taken their toll and he was now acting out sexually.  My heart broke for him but no one else’s did.  Everyone shunned him and didn’t want him in their class.  But I didn’t mind, I welcomed him. This was not because I was a great person it was because I had a different view of Joe. When I looked at Joe I saw the cute, sweet little boy who could flip down the trampoline but no one else saw that.  They just saw him for what he had become.  Hopefully this story will teach us all a lesson. For one thing we all have a sweet child inside of us and that is what God sees.  I think when I was doing drugs, neglecting my children, and living in sin God looked down and saw the hurt little girl who had been abandoned, who found her mother dead after saying horrible things, and had been rejected by her father.  God knew if he could heal that little girl he could heal me and use me.    I just think we should all try to view people from God’s point of view .Our compassion should reach all people not just the cute little Joe’s.  This would help so many people and help break the cycles of addiction and abuse that happen in so many families today. This attitude would enable healing which would open the door for education for so many children who are living in defeat and hopelessness.

Jesus Calms a Storm : Matthew 8:23-27

Matthew 8:23-27

English Standard Version (ESV)

Jesus Calms a Storm

²³ And when he got into the boat, his disciples followed him. ²⁴ And behold, there arose a great storm on the sea, so that the boat was being swamped by the waves; but he was asleep. ²⁵ And they went and woke him, saying, “Save us, Lord; we are perishing.” ²⁶ And he said to them, “Why are you afraid, O you of little faith?” Then he rose and rebuked the winds and the sea, and there was a great calm. ²⁷ And the men marveled, saying, “What sort of man is this, that even winds and sea obey him?”

I thought this photo was cool:)) you can see my reflection as if I am in the picture in the midst of the storm at sea where the boat is being tossed around and almost overcome but actually I am smiling on the other side. A poetic illustration of my life and journey:)))

You are now entering your mission field :)

On May 1 I wrote a blog sharing that I wrestle with the question "Am I doing enough, is this God's will for my life?" when many I know are out in the mission fields and on the streets risking their lives as disciples for Jesus. These are th...oughts I have really struggled with. I felt I heard God and that HIS call on my life was to reach people and make a difference through speaking and writing my book. There was further AMAZING confirmation today. I was gathering some photos for my book proposal and came across the one of me praying before speaking at a church. For the first time I read the plaque on the wall in front of me in the photo. It says "You are now entering your mission field" I got chills :) I don't think God could be more clear about His call on my life . I shared the photo again so you can see the plaque. :))

“As water reflects a face, so a man’s heart reflects the man” (Prov. 27:19).

Character is the sum total of the features and traits that make up the nature and personality of a person. It is who and what we are in essence. People do not choose IQ or talent (those are God‐given), but we do choose character. Each time we choose either good or evil we are building character.

Adversity causes one t...o choose one of two paths—character or compromise. Every time a person chooses character, he becomes stronger, even if that choice brings negative circumstances. Crises may not make character, but it does reveal it.
One can never separate his actions from his character. In fact, action is the real indicator !!!

Good Stuff !! For so long when adversity came my way I chose compromise but today I have changed and choose character. There have been negative circumstances ( not getting a job, rejection, judgment, etc. ) but the freedom I have felt by being totally open and transparent outweighed the negative circumstance and God blessed me with something better. I like the reflection of my heart a lot better today than 10 years ago :)) Thank you God for changing me :))