June 5, 2002- The Next Domino To Fall in the Chain of My Self Destruction

On June 5,2002  I got pulled over at LBJ and La Prada in Dallas, Texas .  I was with a friend from rehab and had just left the drug dealers house. It was about 10 p.m.  As the cops went to their car to run my license I knew I would be searched so I tried to eat part of the drugs I had . It was  extremely hard but I succeeded.

Although the baggies got stuck in my throat I was finally able to swallow them. As they went down the reality set in that I could OD on all these drugs. I had just left the dealer and had all kinds of drugs , I had meth for me and pills and coke that I got for someone else. I ingested a lot and what I didn't eat resulted in a possesion charge that was a state jail felony.   I was really scared because I didn't want to die but I didn't want to tell the cops I ate the evidence either so I just remained silent .

The cops arrested us and  took us to Mesquite city jail and impounded my father’s brand new Lexus that I was not supposed to drive. As I began to call my dad begging him to get me out of jail  he continually ignored my calls. The next day I was transferred to Dallas County Jail and began the arduous process of being booked in. As I was moved from holding cell to holding cell like a herd of cattle I would try and call my dad, he was all I had in this world and my only chance of making bail. He told me he was going to let me sit. But  finally after about 24 hours in Dallas County, before making it to a pod,  my name was called and I had made bail. As I stepped out into the hot Texas sun I looked up at the blue sky swearing I would never use again.  But I knew I was in a lot of trouble because now I had a new charge.

My vow of abstinence from using lasted for about 3 days. By then my 2 days in jail didn’t seem so bad and I went to the drug dealers. In my sick mind I thought I could figure it all out high but once high all I cared about was getting more drugs.  During this crazy time I spent a lot of time between Kilgore and Rockwall and I was about to have another close call, that would be the scariest of all. My life was out of control.