Alexis Rose - The Candle Light Vigil 6/7/12
Susan Washington
As we drove down Brown Street towards New Hope my stomach began to twist and turn and I felt very anxious. It will seem silly but I was concerned no one would be there and that would break my heart for Alexis. I didn’t want her , Hailey, Sammy or her friends who put this together to be hurt. I kept telling myself that she had just died that morning so the odds of there being many people at this vigil were slim although the news had spread fast. We took a right into the parking lot of the church and I didn’t see many cars and I said a prayer leaving it all up to God. Then we pulled to the side of the church and there were cars everywhere. There was a big circle of chairs with people milling around and I began to cry softly so very touched by the outpouring of love. We got out of the car and began to walk to the circle. The first person I saw was David Landis, who had been Alexis boyfriend for almost three years. They had not been together in awhile but he was the boy she had loved and Alexis and I had just spoke about him on Tuesday. David and I hugged and I asked him to sit with us. I could tell he was heartbroken and not sure how to process this loss.
I thought back to my first boyfriend from 8th and 9th grade dying in March. Hal’s death had a huge impact on me and that was just puppy love so I knew this was going to be hard on David even though they were not together. I looked across the circle and saw Jennifer and Rachel Speicher and that touched my heart, Alexis and Rachel had been best friends their sophomore and junior years and although they had drifted apart there was still a strong bond . Riley informed me she and Mommy had gone swimming over at Rachel’s recently and I was happy about that. Beth and Leah came to hug our necks, they had organized the vigil and I could tell their hearts were just broken.
Sammy , Hailey, Warner, and I grabbed our candles and looked through the sea of faces. I think someone said they thought 100 + people were there. Then I looked to my right and saw Riley’s biological father. I had not seen him in over three years and I didn’t know how I felt about that. He looked upset and I remember Riley running around ,as three year olds do, and I got extremely nervous but then I realized she didn’t know him from Adam. She recognized David, but didn’t know who her biological father was. I don’t think he had seen her since she was a baby. He was just another stranger there and I felt calm again. The most important thing to me was that Riley would not have any more surprises that day and I didn’t think her biological father would do anything to hurt her, he had not made any attempt to see her for the last three years and had not provided any support for Riley. So I didn’t think he would cause us problems but I was so wrong about that although that came later in the service.
Alan, our children’s pastor, started the service and we all prayed. It meant a lot to me that Alan was there to lead this, he had helped me with some healing therapy concerning my dad and it had been very emotional for all of us. He is a good man with an awesome testimony and I felt honored that he was there to honor my Rosebud. After praying and saying a few things he asked people to come into the middle of the circle and share memories of Alexis. At first people were hesitant but then as one person shared people began to get more comfortable and many shared their thoughts and memories about Alexis. It was so wonderful to hear all about my daughter.
The most common phrase we heard about her was that Alexis was hilarious and everyone was so happy when she was in their class. They knew it would be a fun year if Alexis Rose Washington was in it. The next most common statement was Alexis spoke her mind and didn’t care what anyone thought. That she was bold and courageous and would stand up for those less fortunate. The records she held at Wylie High School were for the most tardies and most consective days in ISS. To date those records have not been broken :) I remember Alexis laughing and saying those would probably be the only records she ever held, I just laughed along with her. Then the funny stories started and we laughed through our tears. Alexis was such a funny , funny, girl.
I was so touched to see Alexis’ former teacher Mrs. Chapman. Mrs. Chapman taught the parenthood class and she always loved Alexis. I remember her telling me she never worried about Alexis because Alexis was going to make it . She said “ Alexis has strength, passion, intelligence, and drive !! She will go for” I always remembered those words and would cling to them as Alexis struggled after graduating. Earlier in the year Alexis was struggling with what she wanted to do and I told her to call Mrs. Chapman and ask her for advice. They had a great talk and I knew Alexis felt better about things. When Mrs. Chapman got up to share she began to cry and I could tell how much she really loved Alexis. My heart was overflowing. The program came to the end and Riley’s father approached me saying he needed to talk. I said a prayer and said okay . I led him away from Riley so she couldn’t hear because I didn’t have a clue to what he had to say. I was shocked by what came out of his mouth …………………………………….......
Reader Comments (1)
Wow, Susan. Your writing is so engaging. In my own prayers, I thank God for your gift. My little add keeps me from just disappearing, as I would love to, into worlds of fiction. Anything that I have, I would offer if this could be fiction. Your writing is like watching a dance, and thankfully, I can keep up.
Wishfully, it was fiction and Alexis would come through the door with a wild tale of her day. She would tell you all about it, blow by blow ;D, and you could write all about her full range of expression and joie de vivre. I know that is, too, your wish upon a wish, Susan.
It is also, of course, among a young woman's greatest and closest-to-her-heart wish and hope that seats would be filled, laughter would be evoked and friends would feel compelled to share wry and funny stories, at a moment in time, in their honor. Like practicing one's Oscar speech with a hairbrush in front of a fully-lit make-up mirror.
How wonderful for Alexis, that every step of the way, tributes have been organic,
numerous, heartfelt and SRO...and continue today. Surely, I think of Alexis everyday.
With much love, for all of you, and best regard....until tomorrow.